And you have forgotten the exhortation which speaks to you as to sons: “My son, do not despise the chastening of the LORD, Nor be discouraged when you are rebuked by Him; For whom the LORD loves He chastens, And scourges every son whom He receives.” (Hebrews 12:05-06, NKJV).
Do not despise. Do not be discouraged. Understand that the chastening of the Lord only comes to those whom He loves and has received.
From time immemorial, moral men have asked why do the wicked prosper. The Psalms of David and Asaph are rife with such questions, and each time the inquiry is voiced it is answered by some refrain of, "but then I remembered the goodness of the Lord".
The Scriptures provides three basic purposes for suffering in this life: to deepen faith, to provide comfort to others going through similar trials, and chastening - often called correction.
Raising children Biblically, parents understand both the effectiveness and wisdom of disciplining their children, for an undisciplined child is a grief and a heartbreak in so many ways, and in modern times, the effect of ungodly parenting is most often seen in real enmity between child and parent. As the years pass, and the child becomes mobile, verbal, and increasingly rebellious, the parent cannot wait to be shut of them.
In prosperous times, this takes the form of away camps or trips, where significant sums are spent to send the problematic progeny away for varying lengths of time, so that the parents can have peace.
In the West, this is most often visible during Summer, when public schools are not in session, and children are home with at least one parent 24/7. Come September, the secret, and sometimes not-so-secret joy of being able to foist the child back onto the school system descends on many households - you can almost hear the collective national sigh of relief. This is tragic.
And it is notably untrue for Christian homes where the parents have followed the principles of godly child-rearing, teaching the children the way that they should go so when they are old they will not depart from it.
In short, families that have not established and reinforced godly and loving parental authority are, in many ways, breeding grounds for chaos, and later adult irresponsibility.
It is unsurprising then, in the world's long war against God, that the family and family values are being increasingly undermined by the permissiveness of "popularly accepted wisdom". Nowhere is that insidious effect more evident than in the public disrespect shown by children for their parents. Grocery aisle negotiations, gritted-teethed threats, and out and out bribery are often overheard in the marketplace, sometimes escalating to damaging outbursts of wrath bordering on abuse.
In contrast, loving Christian parents have a very different relationship with their children, and it is a picture of the relationship God desires with His children. These families regard one another with respect and love, and desire time together to enjoy the fellowship only possible in Christ. The basis of this harmony is firmly established on the foundation of the Biblical roles of father, mother and child.
The believing father takes responsibility for protection, provision, and discipline, based on the authority given to him by God. He is the servant-leader of the family, always putting the needs of his wife and children before his own needs. When this is done in the power of the Holy Spirit, the parents become beloved and respected anchor points for the children.
While this is considered controversial and old-fashioned (some even term it as vile) today, for generations in this country it was the norm. As a husband and father the man is given the solemn and sacred responsibility for the physical and spiritual well-being of those in his care. He and his wife are tasked with bringing each of their children to faith in Christ. It is their most important function.
This necessarily entails correction, chastening and discipline of the children. This must be done consistently, unemotionally, and in accordance with Biblical principles. The love and authority of Christ must not only be taught, but lived out in the parents' own example.
Disobedience, disrespect, and a bad attitude are childhood offenses that require correction. A parent's directives need to be obeyed the first time, every time. When this bedrock is firmly in place, the relationship between parents and child can proceed as intended from the beginning, with mutual love, respect, loyalty, support, and a desire for fellowship. Over time, the mutual rewards of a close and loving family knit together in Christ are beyond compare.
Add to this the unity in Christ of father and mother, and the Christian home becomes a solid refuge, the center of a nurturing environment from which spring the next generation of Christ's followers.
That is God's plan, and has been from the beginning. And He models it perfectly with us, His children by faith. That is why we are exhorted here not to despise and to not be discouraged when we ourselves are put under correction by God. Not only does it serve the obvious intention of righting our course, but it is also proof that He loves and has received us into His family via adoption as sons and daughters through Christ.
What a stirring and precious reminder, especially when we feel His hand heavy upon us.
Later we will discover that no chastening is joyful for the present, but we are to rejoice at what it yields afterwards in our lives and in our walk with Christ.
As believer's we will have tribulation, and this will come in many forms. When these trials take the form of chastening from God it is because His children have not followed that still small voice within, but have proceeded according to the dictates of their own sinful hearts.
While it is impossible to know for certain whether a trial in someone's life is due to sin, it is sadly evident in many of the most infamous cases. Influential Christian leaders who have fallen in sin often end up with their reputations disgraced publicly, their ministry destroyed, and their congregations badly damaged.
Men and women who knowingly practice sin, willfully, rebelliously, and with premeditation, are often shocked when what they thought was hidden becomes shouted from the housetops. When necessary, the consequences can be devastating.
But there are also far more subtle, and private, rebukes and corrections from our loving King. Cherished plans go awry. Stubborn attitudes cause seemingly endless strife. Life just seems inexplicably hard and there is no sense of peace until the sin is confessed and the behavior is changed. God will use every influence and circumstance to effect His will in our lives - other people, finances, health - whatever it takes. It behooves us to obey long before anything drastic becomes needful.
And all these are intended precisely to result in godly sorrow, not self-condemnation, contempt or discouragement, and it is that sorrow that leads to repentance, and a real and lasting change of heart.
Know this as well, repentance looks like something. It is not just words, it is a softening of the heart towards what is right and a turning away from sin to God.
Think of it this way. When a loving father sees his beloved child willfully engaging in behavior that will only cause danger or damage or heartache, the least loving thing he could do would be to allow it to continue without consequences. That would only serve to reinforce the damaging behavior.
No, a loving father would take what steps were necessary to bring to the errant child's mind what is good and right, and to exhort and encourage, and even demand, that the child change his or her ways. The father would love far too much to do nothing, for ultimately doing nothing would only result in lasting harm.
God loves us too much to allow us to become hardened to the deceitfulness of sin. He will chasten, rebuke and correct when necessary. It is a hallmark of His love.
To be without chastening is to be without God, pure and simple.
